We are all on a path of discovery. Many times, the things that we discover, are areas of belief that need to be corrected. Such has been my journey! So much of what I believed, created actions or responses that had no true or godly foundation. Thoughts and beliefs of parents, peers, teachers and preachers flooded my subconscious; a great amount of truth was peppered with half truths and some outright lies.
As I’ve learned to face myself and those around me, I’ve submitted myself to God and His Word. Until His light began to penetrate the dark places in my life and heart ~ places I had no idea were even there ~ I was trapped and entangled in those half truths and lies! God had to show me His Truth, through His Word and His Holy Spirit’s revelation. I had to be willing to see, and agree, before any change would manifest in my life.
The tactic of our greatest enemy is to keep those wrong thoughts and beliefs hidden. If hidden, they can never change, and will distort our perception of our life, and God’s part in it! As I began to see these truths, I was encouraged to write about them. My forever husband had been asking me to write a book for years, but I couldn’t see how that would even be possible! Why would anyone want to hear what I had to say? God, and my FH thought differently!!! This is just the beginning of all that I sense God wants me to share, but here is a brief excerpt from the book that I am getting ready to send into cyberspace!
By this time I had been in ministry for thirteen years. My convoluted ideas about the Trinity, although previously jumbled, were being clarified. Truth was emerging as I sat with the Holy Spirit and read God’s Word. The lies I had amassed from childhood and religion were being exposed and denounced, but there was a lot of hard work to do. The loving God I knew as a child had been hidden by a cloud of lies, and the Jesus who gave His life for me had been accused of taking everyone close to me. My confusion asked, Was He ready to do it again?
This book involves my former ministry life. Sadly, there are many out there who are in similar situations. They involve beliefs, and families of origin, and marriages in crisis. Often, there is nowhere to turn. This was a summary of my experience ….
Year after year, I felt off balance in my own home. I spent time with my Heavenly Father and His Word most days, while I spent the rest of those days wondering if my husband would ever love me again. He had never been “romantic,” but there were times we’d spend a nice evening out or go to a movie. Those times could be pleasant or strained, depending on his mood. Day in and day out, I’d wonder why I had turned into an obligation and why he wouldn’t do what he promised ~ love me forever.
Misunderstanding of ourselves and others, can create great loneliness. I lived there for years. But God wants to show us who we truly are in Him, and to show us the plan He has for each one of us.
This is my story … coming soon as an e-book! You may learn something new. I know I sure did!