The Journey

She was wet and cold.  The blackness surrounding her was like nothing she had ever known. She never wanted to come on this journey in the first place.  Now, she was wondering if it would be her last.

She remembered falling from a great height.  Others of her kind fell close to her, but she had no idea where they were or how to reach them.  The silence was deafening as she struggled to hear something… anything, from those others. She had never felt so completely alone and helpless. The pressure around her was suffocating.  She was a prisoner in this place and had no One to set her free. She had been in tight places before, but had always been there with others and that experience had been worlds away from this one.  In that other space, there had been a brightness and some room.  She almost felt as if Someone had made a special place where she could be close to those she cared about but far enough away to give her some separation and a little breathing room. Although it was small, it was safe and insulated. She never felt alone there. She never felt this darkness. She never felt this pressure. She never felt this cold and wet.

She had always known, however, that she had a purpose… a reason to exist.  Her earliest memories told her that she was created for something special.  She was so sure about it that it vibrated in her every thought. She was special… one of a kind… made to accomplish great things. That’s why she was so shocked when that world-shattering event took place.

She was resting at the time, contemplating her life. She began to move with her surroundings in a way that was familiar.  The gentle rocking of her world was almost pleasant and she had grown accustomed to this movement and always enjoyed the gentle sensation.  This, however, was different. She began to be violently shaken and was turned upside down. After tumbling over and over and over again, she slammed into a hard object and her room was split open and exposed to the pounding of large drops of a substance she had never experienced before. She felt as if she would drown in its presence as it repeatedly attacked her. It was dark and there was nowhere to hide. Her protection was gone! What had happened? Where were the others? She sensed their presence, but couldn’t see them.

There was something else in her new environment that was hurtful and scary. This “something” kept trying to lift her from the only home she had known. It would attack and she was unable to resist its power.  Each time it came, it moved her just a bit more toward a world that was foreign to her. Little by little she was being dislodged from her special space… her only security! She was petrified! This force grew stronger. It was loud and unrelenting. It seemed that it was screaming at her! She wondered what she had done to create such fury! She was being thrown back and forth against the side of her home. Then, just as she feared, she was lifted and hurled through the darkness and wetness. She turned and twisted and spun out of control. She no longer knew which way was up or which way was down. Just as suddenly as the power had taken her, it dropped her into a soggy, cold place that felt soft, yet unfriendly. She began to sink into this substance and was helpless to resist.  Her security and safety were gone and in their place was fear and hopelessness.

She remembered sinking for a long time and as she did, the darkness grew deeper and the silence more intense. She was now surrounded by this soft, cold, wet substance. She had never felt so alone.  She wondered what she had done to deserve this place of isolation. She waited for someone to rescue her, but each day was the same and slowly she began to lose all hope.

Almost despite these persistent feelings, a new hope seemed to rise out of the darkness that was her new home.  She sensed a long-ago thought… a reminder of her unique purpose. She would have laughed at the ridiculous thought had she not been so overwhelmed by the joy that welled up in her. She always felt that there was something very special on the inside of her that would be needed for Someone, someday… and hope rose in her. Energy she had never experienced began to pulsate at her very core. In the middle of this sightless, soundless, pressure-filled environment, there was a glimmer of New Life in her. She did not resist. She embraced this Energy and submitted herself to its Power. This Source was bigger than anything she had known before and she felt a peace about its entrance into her life. It was nurturing and kind and encouraging. She finally felt at rest in this place of solitude. Yet, somehow, she knew there was more to her life.  She began to follow this vibrating Energy as it gave her direction. She felt different, somehow, as day-by-day she felt herself changing.  It was a good feeling… one that brought joy to her existence despite the fact that nothing on the outside had changed. Yet this Peace and Energy that had become so much a part of her was leading her, nourishing her and growing in her.  She felt reborn.

Then, one day, she was struck by another new sensation; something so bright it blinded her. She had been in darkness so long that this Light made her retreat. This retreat was short-lived, however, since the warmth of the Light drew her upwards. It was then that her awareness grew. She resonated with her destiny as she looked up to see the world in which she was growing. As she gazed upwards toward the warmth of the light, she realized that she was with others of her kind, that this was where she belongs. She felt small and insignificant beside those who had gone before, but she knew that she would slowly grow into the same kind of beautiful, fruit bearing tree that towered over her. She was becoming what God has always intended. This little seed was becoming a tree that would bear the beautiful, lush fruit that would house many more seeds… seeds that may wonder about their purpose and finally discover their destiny. There was no greater joy than to know that she was fulfilling her reason for existence… following in the shadow of those who’d gone before… providing beauty and nourishment for generations to come. Her wondering was over and her new life just beginning. There would be other struggles and other storms, but she would stand strong through them knowing her purpose and her Source. She was growing into what she was destined to be… an apple tree.

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